Pre-Race Jitters?

If someone would have told me a year ago that I would be running a half marathon in 365 days, I would have asked them for a list of their current medications. This is an enormous milestone for me. Tomorrow morning at 7am, history will officially be in the making for me.

As I sit here on my couch, amidst the aroma of my pasta dinner baking in the kitchen - just about 12 hours before the race - I don't feel nervous. I feel anxious, yes. Nervous, no. I guess it's because I know I'll finish - even if it takes 3 hours. I'm shooting for 2:25. That will allow me ample time to acclimate during those first two miles, and average my steady ten minute miles for the remainder of the race.

I thought I'd go ahead and do a summary of my past 121 days of training.

Miles Ran: 252 (this is a close estimate based upon my first two months of training's log + the half marathon schedule I followed.)

Money spent: $168.37
Breakdown is as follows:13.99 for training log; 5.88 (balance after REI dividend) for running tights, hydration system, light-weight long sleeve shirt; $100 for running shoes; $36 for new shirt purchased at the running expo when I picked up my packet (little treat for myself); $12.50 for a ten minute foot massage, also at said expo.

Weight gained/lost: As far as I can tell, I have GAINED anywhere from 3 to 5 pounds.

Blogs entered: 39

Not too shabby. I suppose what surprises me most about the abrupt life change I made 4 months ago is that I'm still actually training. This positively mystifies me. Possible explanations as to why this tangent is sticking and the others did not:

1. The community of friends. I am doing this along with 4 gals, so I'm not alone - and misery loves company.

2. The blog itself. Were it not for my being accountable to you, dear readers, I am uncertain if I'd have lasted through those first 6 weeks. They weren't easy. I read through my blogs the other day and laughed at how exhausting and difficult those 2 and 3 mile runs were. I literally started from scratch - and it wasn't pretty. However - without the blog, I wouldn't have had the virtual-world support and encouragement, as well as the tool with which to keep myself honest.

3. Greg believes in my ability to accomplish this goal without reservation. Makes a huge difference. If I were in his shoes, I would have probably reacted with skepticism upon the announcement of my running a marathon. Not Greg. He has been my biggest unabashed supporter from day zero. Without his positive energy and constant encouragement and support, I think I would have given up on myself by now.

4. Emelyn's enthusiasm has inspired me and kept me going. Every time I go for a run she comments on my running shoes and reminds me that "they're just like my Dora running shoes, mommy!" She always asks me about running and wants to run herself all of the time. I can see the effect my behavior has had on her and that alone is worth it. Today she told perfect strangers at the running expo (where we picked up my race packet) that she was running tomorrow. She also claimed her foot hurt when I was getting a foot massage, so she could get one, too ('just like you, Mommy"). Monkey see, Monkey do, as I'm constantly reminded through Emelyn's actions, and I'm glad to provide a good example to her.

5. Results. I have actually seen results and improvement over the past seventeen and a half weeks (but who's counting). I am serious. My endurance is through the roof (duh), I have more energy, and I feel great all the time. I venture to say that I'm even happier and have much less of a propensity to let small things bother me (though Greg may disagree on that last one when he's the one cooking in the kitchen!). In addition, I can see progress. My runs are getting better and better. My recovery after runs is getting better. Freaking Amazing, I tell you. Who'd of thunk it? Certainly not me.

Of course I know that I am not at the final goal. This is only the half marathon. I guess I should rephrase that "Half Empty" prospective. I'M ALREADY HALF WAY THERE! Tomorrow, I will run 13.1 miles. It will not be pretty for the whole time. In fact, I may need to crawl to the finish line. I may even blow out a knee, twist an ankle, or god forbid trip over my own feet and break an arm, collarbone, et al. None of these "what if's" bother me or even phase me. To me, the important thing is that I started to train for a marathon. I have been training for said event for seventeen and a half weeks now. I am going to attempt a half marathon tomorrow morning. Unbelievable.